He just smiled and gave her a vegemite sandwich

Stuck in the middle with you

2009-07-25T12:46:00.001-07:00

Man, I get engaged and I disappear. It's a shame because I always have a million thoughts to get down in writing.
It's been an incredible few months since the Australian vacay and the engagement. We have nailed down most of the details and are in the mid-part of planning where there is really nothing to do. Once September hits I will probably be plenty busy.
Right now my focus is on getting stuff together for the visa application that we will be submitting in October. I'm trying to get my mind wrapped around the sheer intensity of the situation as they ask for evidence of my existence, evidence of my feelings, and my first born child. I may have to rent a truck to carry all of the paperwork I will be sending to the Australian embassy.I hope they are prepared for a shit storm of information coming their way. Why yes, I DO offer a courtesy flush in the bathroom. I DO have a mugshot, but I was 8 and my mom was dating a cop. Anything else?

Since we got most of the details out of the way Rick and I have been spending a lot of time talking about our relationship. Being so far away all we can do is talk at this point. As such we occasionally get into a bit of a tiff at times because, hey, we're human, and we are far away, and frustrated. Tensions can definitely run high. Anyone who has ever been in a long-distance relationship can attest to the fact that it is HARD work. Points can get missed or misinterpreted and frustrations increase. We had one such frustrating moment when one of us decided to play amateur psychologist. I won't say who, but it was him. Haha. What ensued was a 2 hour long series of texts and phone calls to get it all straightened out. At one point I was so mad I wanted to get on a plane to OZ just to strangle the shit out of him. We ended up getting it all worked out in the end, but it was hard. Relationships are hard period. When you throw in numerous other factors such as time, distance, and lack of physical contact it is easy to see how so many can end badly. I won't let that happen. When the chips fall I still want to be with him more than anything in the world. I love the line from The Wedding Date when they say, " I'd rather fight with you than make love with anyone else." I look at it all as building a stronger foundation for our life together. Every hardship we encounter and succeed in defeating only makes us that much stronger. It's a good thing.

It occurred to me that growing up I never really thought beyond what it would be like to be married. As a girl I had grown up thinking of the wedding I would have someday, but never the marriage. I thought of the dress and the flowers, but never the husband and wife. For me they were mutually exclusive. My Barbie dolls got to throw the flowers and kiss the groom, but I never thought about what life would be like past the dream house. In my world Ken didn't leave the toilet seat up and accuse Barbie of being in a bad mood all the time because he didn't understand her.
Even when I got married at the ridiculously early(for me) age of 20, I really never got beyond the wedding. I never thought about the next day when the wedding was over and you get down to the serious business of being a couple and sharing a life together for better or worse. I was very naive and in retrospect, not in love.
I've realized now, with a little time and maturity, that now it's not so much the wedding as much as I just want to be married to him. I could care less if we got hitched by an ordained horse, I just want to be with him. Good or bad. I want to share my life with this man who infuriates me, exhilarates me, annoys me, stimulates me, frustrates me, challenges me, makes me laugh and loves me unconditionally. Yes, unconditionally. I never thought I would find that, but I did. I found the man I want to be married to, not just someone to stand next to me while I live out my childhood fantasies playing house. I will gladly trade in all of my Barbie dream house scenarios to live in the real world where fights happen, but love endures past saying I do. I have the real thing,and not even Barbie herself can say she has that.

Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it’s the middle that counts the most.-Hope Floats

I never much cared for pork...

2009-04-28T12:18:00.000-07:00

3 weeks and 2 days to go until Rick arrives here in the U.S. That is, if Australia doesn't institute their Fortress Australia pandemic countermeasures in the face of the recent outbreak of swine flu. That could mean that flights in or out of Australia are halted and things more or less shut down. Even if he does manage to make it out here, the chance is real that he might not be let back in right away if they institute those measures after he gets here. For right now though Australia hasn't had any confirmed cases of the swine flu, but they are seeking 22 Aussies who shared the same flight with the 3 New Zealanders who tested positive for it.

Australia has an amazingly thorough quarantine system because they must maintain a delicate balance in their country. Hopefully with that and their adequate vaccine supply the problem will not be bad enough to invoke such extreme measures. Here's hoping...

This is the part where my head explodes.

2009-04-21T17:09:00.001-07:00

So we are planning the wedding among various other things, but more importantly we are getting a checklist together of everything we need to have and do for the spousal visa for Australia and can I just say, WHOA. My head is spinning and the sheer amount of things needed to be done is really overwhelming. This is where my obsessive list making comes in. This is also where Rick's obsessive nature for doing things thoroughly and early comes in very handy. We balance. I make lists, he makes sure it's all carried out.

We were really good about setting a date and finding the place and venue for the wedding and reception within a week of discussing it. Our original plans were to do something small both in America and Australia, but his family was more than willing to make the trip to the U.S. to see us married here so we just decided to do it.(I told him he's like the pink elephant because at the age of 37 they probably classified him as a confirmed bachelor. haha!)I am really surprised most of them are coming, and I'm super excited to see our families interact. For those not able to attend, we will just have a small dinner in OZ when I finally get to call it home.

It was a stressful week as we nailed down details and a TO DO list, but finally I feel organized. I just have to realize to take on one thing at a time and remember that at the end of all of this chaos is that I will get to be with the man I love, and honestly, life is good.

We're engaged!

2009-04-09T05:47:00.000-07:00

Yes! Yes! Yes!
I am so excited!.
He proposed April 4th.

After a wonderful 10 days in Australia I was awakened at the ass-crack of dawn on the last Saturday before I left. His eagerness to have me see an "Australian sunrise" got me out of bed despite heavily protesting how very tired I was. We arrived at The Shallows in Shellharbour and walked down when it got a bit light. He set out chairs in the wet sand and we wrapped up in 2 big, comfy blankets shivering under the cloudy sky. I didn't think the sun would show itself, but he was just so cute about wanting to do it. About 7AM-ish I hear a violin playing behind me and I whipped my head around and instantly knew what was about to happen. I turned to him laughing and said, " Are you serious? OMG Are you kidding?" He said, " What song is it?" I recognized our song Brighter Than Sunshine by Aqualung.He took out a ring and asked me to marry him, and I wholeheartedly without reservation said YES!. I think I was a bit stunned. I was an absolute mess and I was not exactly an enthusiastic morning person, but he takes the bad with the good and promised himself to me. He is such an amazing person and I am the happiest woman right now.

Oh Australia how I love thee...

2009-03-27T05:31:00.000-07:00

3 days down in the land down under and I'm having a blast! Still so much to see and do, but here are some highlights.

Stanwell Tops Overlook. Gorgeous view!

Chicken chips. Chicken flavored chips. CHICKEN! I am trying to figure out why. They taste like a chip covered in chicken bouillion. It's good...just...chickeny.

I drove today. It was such a weird feeling being on the opposite side. I kept hitting the windshield wipers instead of the turn signal. Arrrghhhh...

Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree......

So. cute. Could. die. We went to Simbio Wildlife Park. We got to feed the kangaroos and pet the koalas. What a fantastic experience!

A beautiful view from Warilla. I miss the beach!!!

My sweetie. Seriously the best man ever. I am so lucky.

I will post more soon. I am meeting the friends tomorrow night and the family on Sunday. Wish me luck! haha!

I'm Leeeeeavin' On A Jetplane....

2009-03-23T09:41:00.001-07:00

The day has finally arrived! I can't believe that in about 28 hours I will finally get to meet the man I fell in love with.

I am beyond excited.

My bags are packed and I'm DEFINITELY ready to go. I cannot wait!

We have so many things planned that I'm wondering how we are going to fit them all in. In a list in no particular order is what we have planned to do.

Visit Sydney
Brunch on Balmoral Beach
Dinner with his friends
BBQ with his family(i.e. meeting the 'rents)
Kitchen shopping-Oh yes!
Bondi-Coogee Walk
Taronga Zoo
Symbio Wildlife Park
Royal Botanic Gardens
Drive up to the Blue Mountains
Learn to drive on the LEFT side of the road
Movies
Bridge Climb
and a little bit more, but he's not sayin!

I will try to update with pictures while I'm there. For now, I have to go...I have a plane to catch!

He's from Australia.They just kill things there!

2009-02-23T18:59:00.000-08:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It's Judd Apatow's film. I HAVE to see this!

We've got a goofy kind of love...

2009-02-21T20:18:00.001-08:00

4 weeks until I finally see the man I love! 4 weeks! It was 5 months ago that we planned this and it's getting closer and closer. I can hardly wait!

Each day I find another reason to love him. The thoughtful goober drove an hour to get to a store called Sugar Fix so he could get me Cherry coke to drink when I'm there. The fact that he paid $35 for a 12 pack made me cry tears of pain and happiness. Hahaha! But what a thoughtful sweetheart.

He's also has a great sense of humor as witnessed by the following photos.

I love this man more than he will ever know.

"Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those who I love,I can; all of them make me laugh." W.H. Auden

Today I met the boy I'm gonna marry....

2008-12-29T13:36:00.000-08:00

...he's all I wanted all my life and even more.
All of my life I have had some idea of what I wanted in a man. After failed relationships and a failed marriage I was still hopeful, but somewhat resigned to the fact that I might not find what I was looking for. When I least expected it I found him. I finally found the man who exceeded everything I ever thought I wanted.

Our story

His name is Rick and he's from Australia. We met online in March/April 2007 on ICQ. He said hi first. It started out as nothing more than a few chats here and there. The time difference, distance, and lack of anything more than aquaintance didn't lend itself to long drawn out conversations. It was all just fun and flirtation. I was fascinated about him and where he was from because of my lifelong love for all things Australian. Over the next year we would chat ocassionally, but nothing more. I stayed off of ICQ for awhile until I got my new computer. Then in March 2008 I logged back in and found some old messages from him. We got back in touch and began sending more messages back and forth to each other. Even when we didn't catch each other online we would leave offline messages.
I began to think about him more and more. We had so much in common despite being from two different countries. He was smart and sweet. He made me laugh and made me think. This went on for a few months. I dated on and off and ended a short relationship in September 2008. Rick and I started talking even more and at the end of September we exchanged email addresses and eventually addresses and phones numbers. Neither one of us was really looking for anything from each other being as how we were so far away from one another. It just didn't occur to me to consider it. Eventually throughout the proceeding months the emails increased, the phone calls came daily, camera chats for hours became the norm and my friendship for him turned into feelings.
The day I told him I cared for him as more than a friend took me by surprise. I went to a friend's for an out of town visit and we texted throughout the weekend. We had a small misunderstanding due to a user error by me. His reaction hurt me because he was hurt. That's when I realized that I was starting to have feelings for him. Another text a few days later made me tell him. He wrote saying he loved our talks and was just enjoying the ride until I met someone and they swept me off my feet. That night I got in contact with him and let him know how I felt. To my complete and utter surprise he felt the same towards me. Since then like turned into adoration which turned into complete and utter love. I am consistently amazed at how my love for him grows each and every day.
Now, at this point we have not physically met. Some might find that weird and question the depth and truth of our feelings for each other because of that, but for us, we know for sure. When you know, you know. How different is our love than people who fell in love by letters in the old days? We have the benefit of technology on our side that made it so much easier.
We plan on meeting in March 2009 when I fly out to Australia. It will be a culmination of everything we have created for ourselves and the feelings we share for each other. I can hardly wait. This is the man I was meant to meet. I found love where I least expected to find it. I wouldn't change a thing.

In the beginning...

2008-12-29T13:22:00.000-08:00

So this is the beginning. I fell in love with the man of my dreams, who just happens to be Australian. To quote Matthew Perry in Fools Rush In-slightly modified, " He's everything I never knew I always wanted." I will attempt to write about my hopes and fears about being in love with a man who will, literally in more ways than one, completely turn my world upside down. I can hardly wait for the rest of my life to begin.